Home Organization and Cleaning For Kids

Provided by: Jorbins.com

Just imagine if your kids can help a little bit more with the house cleaning. Imagine if they were to keep their room more organized.

For some parents this may be a bit hard to imagine. For them, just getting kids to do housework is like trying to get a snail to do a mile run in less than an hour. For some parents it may seem completely impossible.

There is hope, but...

You must be willing to do some work and stick with it!

This may not be what some parents want to hear let alone do. For those who fear a little work are destined to fail in teaching their children a good healthy habit of cleaning and organizing. Then again, they very well may get lucky and their children learn on their own from experience.

As you read this article you must keep in mind that a healthy habit is what you are after. Not tricks to get your children to take one time action on their cleaning and organizing duties. Tricks may be of short term help, but building a foundation for habit is where your success lies.

Know Your Child's Mood

Your child's emotional state (mood) is the most important thing you should recognize as a parent. Without knowing your child's emotions you can easily and unwillingly cause conflict.

If you cause conflict you can change the association a child has towards you and the act of cleaning and organizing. If that association turns to grief, conflict, or misery you can expect that your child will resist. Think how willing you would be if you associate pain to the task. Your goal is to make the whole process a pleasurable one not a miserable one.

Ok, so let's say your child is grumpy. If you tell him/her to clean their room they will probably be unwilling to do so. Rather than punishing the child, take a look at WHY they are grumpy. Did something happen during the day? Are they tired? Are they hungry? Were they expecting something and not get it? Do they want to experience an emotion like significance, love, excitement, etc.?

You should help the child to understand what they are grumpy about while looking for ways to talk them through to a more positive mood.

What you are going to do is help them to realize that their are positive alternatives to view their situation. By doing this you give them a CHOICE on how to feel. It also helps change their focus from the one single thing making them grumpy to other things that make them feel happy.

When you take this approach you should not tell a child how to feel! You let them discover the alternatives for themselves. The best way is to ask simple questions and let them respond. When they respond, you relate to that response then ask another question. When you relate, your child becomes more connected to you thus open for more communication and suggestions. When you ask questions you guide them through their alternative reasoning and emotions but in a way they think of those alternatives themselves.

If you have troubles, just relax because it takes practice. If they respond negatively, back off a bit. Give them time to be ready. Don't drill the kid with questions. Learn to relate no matter what they say then ask only 1 question and wait for their response. Keep cool because their responses may not be what you want to hear.

You can try an alternative also. All you have to do is do something off the wall crazy or make a funny statement to get your child to change their focus. If they respond to it, get your child involved. Let them move in a crazy fashion with you or say something funny. If their mood changes then you can talk attempt a talk with them.

Once you have them in a positive mood your child will be more receptive to an instruction to clean and organize. This will create a positive experience that will be associated with cleaning and organizing that they will carry with them throughout life.

Even though you get them in a positive mood you need to keep in mind that they may need to fulfill a different mood/emotion. If their task of cleaning and organizing does not fulfill that mood/emotion then they again will not be as likely to do the task. If this is the case you need to either make the process fulfill that emotion and/or when they are done as a reward.

Once you can help them control mood you can start to instill the habit.

The Habit Of Cleaning And Organizing

Since good healthy habit is what we are after, it is good to know that habits generally form in about 21 days. Keep in mind that habits just do not form all by themselves. You must continuously repeat the actions and thoughts.

This tends to be the most difficult part. But if you help a child change moods, it isn't so difficult to do.

What you will essentially do is create a ritual and stick with it for at least 21 days. After the 21 days you can slowly back off your involvement and see how well they react when you simply instruct them. Remember to always link good emotions each and every time until it is virtually automatic.

There still will be times when you have resistance! But that is ok. Your mood is never constant either. Just help them to change their mood again as we discussed above.

Choose A Time Of Day

When creating a cleaning and organizing ritual for your child what you should do is choose a specific time of day. Give your child a SPECIFIC 30 minutes to an hour in a day that is devoted to their duties. This way they can always expect that certain time slot is their time to do their cleaning and organizing.

Right before you have them do any cleaning make sure they are in the proper mood.

Teach Your Child How/Why

Teach your child why they should clean and organize. Help them to rationalize why they are doing it each time they do. By doing so you are "burning it" in their minds that this is a good thing for them with the alternatives being something less than enjoyable.

A good way to do this is simply ask them what would happen if a toy, for example, were not picked up. What would happen if someone were to step on their favorite toy. Ask them if this is something they would like happen and what they can do to prevent it from happening.

You should also teach a child HOW to clean and organize by simply becoming a role model for your child. Not only should you practice what you preach in your everyday actions, but you should also get down and clean and organize with your child until they know the proper way to do it. Don't take for granted that they automatically know. They probably don't.

As you do teach them look to see if they are taking shortcuts or become lazy. Stop them in their tracks and gracefully change this type of action. If you don't they will develop a bad habit if they repeat this behavior over and over.

Make sure you keep helping them do their cleaning and organizing until they fully understand and are able to do it well on their own. Back down on your involvement little by little each day until you take virtually no part in it.

Ways To Make It Easy

If you find a child is struggling with their cleaning and organizing make sure that their tasks are easy for them to handle. Create special bins that are labeled or color-coded. Like items should go together. Make your child fully understand each one is for and that there is a place for everything.

Quit playtime 5-10 minutes early for pickup time. This is a mini ritual you should instill. Stopping their playtime early to pick up will drastically cut down on the amount of cleaning and organizing they have to do later.

Maintain The Fun

Remember what we discussed earlier about the mood they are in right before, during, and directly after cleaning and organizing? This one deals with their mood DURING the act of cleaning and organizing.

You want to create a connection between the act of cleaning and organizing and fun. You probably wouldn't guess what would happen if you don't create this connection. Well, you probably can! Yes, they will resist.

Ways To Keep It Fun:

Set a timer and have a race - Set a timer for thirty seconds and they must see how many items they can put away in that time. Reward them for their good work and talk about it. Set the timer again and they must break their record.

Play Simon Says - Sit in the room with your child and instruct them to pick up any item that you say to pick up. They are only allowed to pick up the ones when you say "Simon says."

Match Colors - Give them a color and they must find a toy with the same color and put it away in the proper place.

"I spy" - You say "I spy something with my eye that flies." Your child must find the object that flies and put it away.

Always reward when they get something right! If your child does get something wrong GUIDE them to the right answer to where they discover it on their own. Don't directly show them the answer.

Rewards That Actually Work!

A reward is a motivator. It is something that fulfills an emotion that a child WANTS to experience. The only way to get to it is through taking action on cleaning and organizing.

The thing is, the reward must fulfill a current emotional need. If a child needs excitement, a reward that does not produce this feeling will not be a very effective motivator. Since their needs change everyday giving the same reward over and over just might not work. So be sure to match the reward to the emotion they want fulfilled.

Also know that a reward is just not just a motivator! Rewards are good emotions children obtain during and directly after they clean and organize. Children do not understand this important fact in life, but this does not mean it doesn't apply.

With a reward you are giving the child a specific emotion to feel and an indirect one. The direct one is the result of experiencing the reward. The indirect one is a sense of accomplishment. Both feelings get linked to the action that has lead them to the reward. This is what you want. If a link is not developed the habit won't be appealing to maintain.

Be Patient

This whole process takes time so be patient and don't get discouraged. Do not get upset if your child's actions are not that of what you expect. Rather, look deeply at why they are doing, saying, and feeling what they do. This is the most important aspect of this process as well as being a parent.

It is recommended that you print a copy of this article for reference. If you see another parent struggling with getting their children to clean and organize feel free to send them a copy.